This is my horcrux

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 06:35:46 -0400

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 06:07:18 -0400

lost-in-ikea: glam00ur: all 46 excuses on my...

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 05:39:18 -0400

glam00ur:

all 46 excuses on my friends wall,

1. i was just really, really early for tomorrow

2. we can’t all be usain bolt

3. in this day and age, we shouldn’t need labels like “late”

4. i had pe first period do you blame me

5. i really, really didn’t want to sing

6. my brother thought it would be hilarious to drop me outside the prison gates

7. you can’t tell me how to live my life

8. #YOLO

9. my legs fell off and i had to roll all the way to the emergency clinic

10. there was a freak yachting accident

11. i am a fucking retard

12. this is just for my wall

13. do you even read these

14. “it does not matter how slow you go, so long as you do not stop”

15. i spent my entire night writing tom daley fanfiction

16. my father left my mother for an air hostess seven years ago do you expect me to get over that emotional trauma overnight

17. sarah palin and i got into a twitter war and i couldn’t leave and let her win

18. traffic jammy jammy jam

19. how can i go to school when alex turner

20. my sim was having an emotional meltdown and i needed to be there for her

21. i was sticking it to the man

22. i spent my entire night worrying if i would ever lose my virginity

23. fifty shades of late; i was walking and then i caught the eye of an attractive member of the opposite sex and we began exchanging significant looks and i knew we would one day make sweet love so i just walked alongside him and tried to catch his eye and to be continued

24. part two he was playing hard to get so we walked and walked and he had the perfect hair colour it was sort of beige brown anyway it turned out he was walking to a bus stop so obviously i had to catch the bus because true love and silently we rode out to papakura and into the sunset

25. my meth lab caught fire

26. my bed is more comfortable than your school will ever be

27. i was sad

28. it was a nice day, so i walked leisurely

29. i had beat my younger brother for saying “swag”

30. i had to travel back to the 1950’s to ensure my birth

31. 2 kool 4 scool

32. i had to stop, collaborate and listen

33. i tried

34. i’m sorry i’m late

it’s not my fault

my auntie was killed

and i joined a cult

35. a haiku about lateness:

late late late late late

late late late late late late late

late late late late late

36. my best friend was telling me how to give a satisfactory blow job i wish i was joking

37. i was fashionably late

38. i was caught in a flash mob true story omfg

39. i did not choose the late life, the late life chose me

40. do

41. you

42. even

43. read

44. these

45. i was fighting al qaeda

46. traffic

YESSSS IT’S ON MY DASHBOARD AGAIN

the post that doesn’t age

wellmakeawish: amythegeek: amsterdamnedd: basedgosh: if my kids end up being better looking than...

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 05:10:46 -0400

wellmakeawish:

amythegeek:

amsterdamnedd:

basedgosh:

if my kids end up being better looking than me theyre grounded

guys the disney fandom just took over a text post

YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 04:42:48 -0400

lolsofunny: niknak79: “Joystick” (lol here!)

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 04:14:21 -0400

lolsofunny:

niknak79:

“Joystick”

(lol here!)

laughingstation: More FUNNY POST here!

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 03:46:15 -0400

laughingstation:

More FUNNY POST here!

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 03:17:44 -0400

queenofslash: so we were talking about sexism in maths and i sit on a table with all boys, and i...

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 02:49:41 -0400

queenofslash:

so we were talking about sexism in maths and i sit on a table with all boys, and i said “you know women could all agree to stop having sex with men and essentially stop the human race” and this one boy goes “well boys could all agree to stop having sex with women and-” but this other boy cut him off like “yeah dude that ain’t gonna happen” and i died

niknak79: The Bad dad more looks fun

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 02:21:41 -0400

niknak79:

The Bad dad more looks fun

liberatingreality: This may be the most powerfully accurate...

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 01:53:12 -0400

liberatingreality:

This may be the most powerfully accurate image I’ve ever seen in my life.

death-by-lulz: actionjacksonlovesbbq: #syphilis

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 01:25:11 -0400

death-by-lulz:

actionjacksonlovesbbq:

#syphilis

iamafrayedknot: jensedpadaleckles: I’ve seen a lot of this guy...

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 00:56:41 -0400

iamafrayedknot:

jensedpadaleckles:

I’ve seen a lot of this guy and his good deeds on my dashboard. It got me curious as to who he is.

I did a little research and found out that his name is Andrew Ducote.

He no longer works for Disneyland on a count of the fact that they didn’t want him playing Peter Pan anymore because he was getting wrinkles under his eyes. They offered him another job at the park but he refused. He liked being Peter Pan and he didn’t want another position.

He ended up getting married to a girl named Hali Gaskins who played Wendy at the park.

His twitter.

I know that I can’t be the only one who was curious about him. Hence this post.

How ironic that Peter Pan got fired for growing up

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Wed, 19 Jun 2013 00:28:40 -0400

Why I think my dad's a hunter

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 23:32:11 -0400

novvak:

novvak:

He “works” with guys named Sam, Dean and Crowley

He has a really huge “hockey bag” that we’re not allowed to look in

We have an outrageous amount of salt in the basement

(that’s just the start, there’s more in the garage)

He also really likes his leather jacket.

UPDATE: HE’S ALWAYS ON BUSINESS TRIPS AND ONCE CAME HOME FROM A “HOCKEY GAME” WITH A HUGE CUT ON HIS NECK